Animation?!

Q. What kind of horse only appears after the sun goes down?
A. A nightmare.

Q. Why did the horse cross the road?
A. Because he wanted to visit his neigh-bors!

Q. How do you call a barber cat?
A. Yell..."Hair Kitty!"

Q. What did the doe say as she came running out of the brush?
A. That's the LAST time I do THAT for two bucks!

Q. What do you call four sheep tied to a post in Cardiff (Wales)?
A. A leisure centre.

Q. Where do they get virgin wool?
A. Ugly sheep.

Q. What's worse than finding a worm in the apple you're eating?
A. Finding half a worm.

Q. Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
A. He was dead.

Q. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?
A. Monkey see, monkey do.

Q. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree?
A. Peer pressure.

Q. What does a Walrus and Tupperware have in common?
A. Their both looking for a tight seal.

Source: Partially from www.pethumor.com

Child and a Ball

Truck Line!

If you are not able to read the lines in the photo well, sorry, it was taken from my phone, however it goes as

Thought of the Day
SAFETY!
------------------
Behind every bouncing ball
there is a running child

I wonder if Michael Jackson owns this company!! :)

Build me up, buttercup!

Paula Garcés

Did you ever watch the movie Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle, if you have not, its worth a try. Its quite a stupid movie, but you will have fun watching it.

And this chick comes as the hot Maria in that movie and totally rocks your cradle. Can you believe she is only 30 years old, married to a Deli owner and has a baby girl. MILF!! Women are supposed to be at the height of their "careers" (no offence meant) when they reach 30.

She has acted in the up-coming moive Man of the House, gotta watch it, atleast for her.

Some corny lines

I dont know what people were thinking ...

Customers come first - check out how many real stories you get.
Customer parking in the rear - theres even websites selling these boards

And heres my own, home cooked, 100% "n" quote.
Vici, Vidi, Vini (I saw, I conquered, I came)

Did you know?!

It seems that this guy had been experimenting with an unusual method of seeking autoerotic gratification - namely, by inserting a live fish into his butt. What he hadn't counted on was the fish's scales acting, in effect, like one of those sets of driveway spikes that allow you to drive over them one way but puncture your tyres if you try to go the other way. In his pain and panic, he dialed 911. The EMT arrived, surveyed the situation, and said, "Son, you gotta learn to chew your food better."

Source: FunnyFact.com

Looks pretty farce, but what the hell, you never know. People are crazy!

Grace!

What will you be called by your friends if you were dumped by Debra Messing of the Will and Grace fame?



That you have fallen from Grace :)

Funny T-Shirts

Funny T-Shirts

This website has some really hilarious t-shirts, check out their catalog for all the designs they have. Funny guys, I am surely getting one of these :)
Some more

Bored board?

nowhere
Originally uploaded by jorb.

Did you ever need directions? I never did, expect the one time I took a bunch of kids on a trek and was horribly lost in the woods of Agumbe. This is just what I would need. :) Wonder why all the markers point in the same direction.

I should patent my ideas

I was just talking to my friend and we were discussing ideas for restaurants, weird and innovative ones, and I am sure this one did appear in our conversation. I should now go and patent our other ideas too :)

Nudists dine in New York style

Art of Love?

A strip club in Boise, Idaho has found an artful way to prance past a city law that prohibits full nudity.

On what it calls Art Club Nights, the Erotic City strip club charges customers $15 for a sketch pad, pencil, and a chance to see completely naked women dancers.

In 2001 the Boise City Council passed an ordinance banning total nudity in public unless it had "serious artistic merit" -- an exemption meant to apply to plays, dance performances and art classes.

"We have a lot of people drawing some very good pictures," said Erotic City owner Chris Teague, who has posted many of the drawings around the club.

Check out Yahoo! news for the full story.

Whos the naked ape?

Two women sacked from their jobs caring for a gorilla in the US have sued their ex-employer for allegedly ordering them to show the animal their breasts.

Nancy Alperin and Kendra Keller claim they were told to show their nipples to the gorilla, Koko, as a way of bonding.

Sign language requests from Koko, the "talking" gorilla, were allegedly relayed to the women by the Gorilla Foundation's head, Francine Patterson.

The Gorilla Foundation, based in San Francisco, strongly denies the claims.

Full story at BBC

Four-year-old drives mom's car to video store and back

A boy drove his mother's car to a video store in the middle of the night, police said - and he's all of 4 years old.

Even though he was unable to reach the accelerator, the boy managed to put the car in gear and the idling engine provided enough power to take him slowly to the store, a quarter-mile from his home, about 1:30 a.m. Friday, Police Chief Doug Heugel said. Finding the store closed, the youngster began a slow trip home.

Weaving and with its headlights off, the car got the attention of police Sgt. Jay Osga, who initially thought he was following a driverless car that had taken off after being left running at a gas pump.

The car turned into the boy's apartment complex and struck two parked cars, then backed up and struck Osga's police car.

That's when Osga discovered the boy inside.

"He knew how to go from forward to reverse," Osga said Monday. "The mother said she taught him how to drive by letting him sit on her lap and steer."

No charges will be filed against the boy or his mother, Heugel said.

"He's 4 years old. His mom didn't even know he was up," Heugel told The Grand Rapids Press. "I don't think he even realizes what he did."

Source: KTSP

Love Thy Neighbor?

A Colorado judge ordered two teen-age girls to pay about $900 for the distress a neighbor said they caused by giving her home-made cookies adorned with paper hearts.

The pair were ordered to pay $871.70 plus $39 in court costs after neighbor Wanita Renea Young, 49, filed a lawsuit complaining that the unsolicited cookies, left at her house after the girls knocked on her door, had triggered an anxiety attack that sent her to the hospital the next day.

Full Story on Yahoo! News

Strange Names

Strange names for people, I have always been interested in such people. How about these? How about Peter Eastman who changed his name to Trout Fishing in America in 1994.

There are about 200 listed Dicks in USA alone, about 150 people with the last name Cant. Wow, thats a nice name for a boss. Some more
47-Dog
127-Car
65-Sandy Beach

115-Horse
46-Antelope
16-Ant
4-Mermaid

116-Miss
103-Try
33-Funny
3-Dirty
72-Thing
86-Cute
200-Hair (Funniest was Ha'veen Hair)
18-Peep
136-People (Funniest were Tonya People, With D People)
1-Results
200-Fail
200-Boss (cheez, they need to be named that?)
8-Account
29-Chair
36-Table

I found these people in the phonebook, no jokes.
Horace Dicks (can you imagine how to pronounce this name)
Rose Dicks, wow thats a romantic one.

But the best of all is there are about 200 people named Moron. Beat that!!

Dont believe me, try the Yahoo People Search

When did you last see a good Venn?

Here it is
Venn Diagram

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the third hand on the watch called a second hand?

Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?

Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?

Why is the man who invests all your money, called a broker?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

Why is it called lipstick if you can still move your lips?

Why is it that to stop Windows, you have to click on "Start"?

Why do steam irons have a permanent press setting?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?

How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?

Why is there an expiration date on my sour cream container?

If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

What's another word for thesaurus?

Why do they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?

What do they use to ship styrofoam?

When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?

Why is abbreviation such a long word?

Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

What was the best thing before sliced bread?

Why do they call it a TV set when you only get one?

What do you do when you see an endangered animal that eats only endangered plants?

If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

If you're cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

Why do people who know the least know it the loudest?

Is it possible to be totally partial?

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

If the funeral procession is at night, do folks drive with their lights off?

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

When it rains, why don't sheep shrink?

Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?

How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America

If carrots are so good for the eyes, how come I see so many dead rabbits on the highway

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

If "Q" were castrated, would he become "O"?

Isn't Disney World a people trap run by a mouse?

Where does the fire go when the fire goes out?

What's another word for synonym?

So what's the speed of dark?

Is reading in the bathroom considered Multi-Tasking?

If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?

Why do they call it the Department of Interior when they are in charge of everything outdoors?

Why do you press harder on a remote-control when you know the battery is dead?


All lines are from www.bitoffun.com

How about doing something worthwhile

Sometimes dont you feel you should do something to help others. Anything other than the routine mundane things we all do everyday. Here is a nobel website which facilitates such a thing, volunteermatch.com

Here you can look for anyone requesting volunteer help, some of the posting do look like job openings, but thats beside the point. You can look for the kind of work you need. You will be suprised with the amount of postings this website has.

You can also look for help from like minded people, if you are trying to do something on your own as well. I am surely signing up for something.

Our test website

We are in the process of building a new site. This is a test link for Ravi Kiran from my site as a referer.
rent your car today | Budget

Please dont bother going there if you are not Ravi :)

Ostermiller Java Utilities

If you are scratching your head about tiny little (common) problems in Java, a search in Google is always worth it. Look what I found, com.Ostermiller.util Java Utilities

The String Tokenizer and CSV utilities are cool stuff, u would want to use but not write them ground up.

Astrology

I was talking to my colleague about how accurate can Astrology be. How can one being born on a particular day and month dictate how you lead your life, what do you this day and this month.

For many many months, I used to have news paper delivered home, and every morning I would read the daily forecast, it always used to turn out to be events that happened the previous day. I used to think its probably because I am a cusp (born on the border-line of the zodiac boundaries)

But mostly its all in the human brain, we always like to predict and interpret, continously trying to find meaning in chaos.

Sake! Beke!!

This line was made popular by one on my "famed" classmates.
But in a new context "Sake Beke", was something refreshing, the clean rice drink, the Japanese folks miraculously came up with. What’s the probability of that happening? There are so many tropical countries and almost a third of the world’s population eating rice as their staple diet, but no other rice drink is as popular as Sake.

I was surprised to find out its 80% pure water, check this out, if you don’t believe me.

I am a hot sake guy; prefer that any day to a cold drink. I like it warm :)

Apprentice

My Fav Apprentice

This girl looks pretty hot and she is pretty smart too in the boardroom. I would like this lady to make it to final few people. And is she really just 22? Suddenly I feel old. I liked the first season a lot, the second was a little ok, but the third is quite crappy. Is this always the case with any Season III? Godfather was the probably the only thing which held up, even though the third part was only good-enough.

It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day just exactly fits in the newspaper.

:)) Seinfield is quite funny!

I was the best man at the wedding. If I'm the best man, why is she marrying him?
Introducing 'Lite' - The new way to spell 'Light', but with twenty per cent fewer letters.
Where lipstick is concerned, the important thing is not color, but to accept God's final word on where your lips end.
A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.
A bookstore is one of the only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.

Its commercial Time

Remote Control
Find more at www.stupidity.org.

Well, everyone is getting commercial this weekend, after all its the super bowl.

Here are some links with some commercials, really good ones.

- Epica- European Ad Awards,
- This site will surely crack you up, the videos are a little low resolution, but they make it up in material. Check it out, especially the British and the Australian commercials.
- Dont forget to check out the banned Superbowl ad on Budweiser, its pretty good too.